Clever Things to Say

One man’s trash is another man’s baby.

If someone uses fire to fight fire she will likely end up with just a bigger conflagration. But at least she can say to herself, “I’d like to think my fire won.”

They say, “don’t shit where you eat.”  But they also say, “don’t eat where you sleep.” However, that doesn’t rule out sleeping where you shit. Which was how I got caught napping in my boss’s car.

It’ll be a cold day in Los Angeles before I move back.

A coward dies a thousand deaths, a brave man dies but once… but far more horribly.

It’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how hard you fucked his wife.

There’s a sucker born again every minute.

When people say “the more the merrier” they are talking about drugs, right?