April twentieth is a day when people watch their plans go up in smoke and are happier for it.
I’ve got a few bad habits but who doesn’t? Sometimes I bite my nails, big deal right? Sometimes I bite other people’s nails, why should they care? They weren’t using them. So like I said, maybe I have a bad habit of cutting people off in traffic, it’s just that every time I see someone’s [...]
Mechanic: Otto
Gardener: Rose
Car Dealer: Mercedes
Drug Dealer: Crystal
Burglar: Rob
Congressman: Bill
Plumber: John
Athlete: Jacque
Cartoonist: Drew
Tech Writer: Manuel
Geneticist: Gene
Computer Engineer: Chip
Hip Computer Engineer: Mack
Hippie: Van
In the last few days I’ve been asking people about their plans for New Year’s Eve. So I wrote down some of the more popular and interesting responses.
Get drunk
Get wasted
Get drunk and wasted
Make up for entire year’s worth of disappointing parties
Rape
Anxiously host new Year’s party and pray friends come through with the drugs
Finish New Year’s [...]
Drugs are great until they fall into the wrong hands. I am referring, of course, to the police.
LSD can profoundly affect the way that one looks at psychedelic posters.
The main reason I want health insurance is so that I can get fun drugs that will make me overall less healthy.
4/20 is like Christmas for stoners except instead of decorating trees you light them on fire.