Clever Things to Say

Every man thinks that playing the stock market is like shooting fish in a barrel. What each man fails to realize is that he’s the fish.

We’re always told to face our fears. But what if your greatest fear is whatever is behind you?

The international symbol for marriage is a white flag.

Love can cause you to overlook anything about a person. Sometimes everything.

I laid down my grudge to bear. I now use it to grind my axe.

If a man treats women like objects then the most generous assumption is that he’s too stupid to know the difference.

In attempting to keep up with the Jones’ I accidentally ran over the Smith’s.

I may hate the person I become when drinking but in all fairness I don’t think he cares for me either.